Fair Warning

Disclaimer: Unless you are named “Lassgo P. Numbdumb”, you may read only the “odd numbered words” (every other word beginning with the first) of the message below. If you have violated that, then you hereby owe the me $10 for each even numbered word you have read.

Addendum: This disclaimer is intended for the use of the individual readers and may contain information that is confidential, privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humur or irrational religious beliefs. If you are not the intended reader, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this, the information posted on this blog, is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas. Unless the word absquatulation has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored. No animals were harmed in the writing of any post on this blog, although one of my miniature pinches is living on borrowed time, let me tell you. Those of you with an overwhelming fear of the unknown will be gratified to learn that there is no hidden message revealed by reading this warning backwards, so just ignore that Alert Notice from Microsoft. However, by pouring a complete circle of salt around yourself and your computer, you can ensure that no harm befalls you and your pets. If you have some how do not understand this disclaimer, please add some nutmeg and egg whites and place it in a warm oven for 40 minutes at 425 degrees F. For high altitude, find more frogs and place a whisky sour in a sippy cup, fall down hill and use low altitude instructions. Whisk briefly and let it stand for 2 hours before icing.

Addendum to the Addendum: Sometimes words in this blog may be misspelled. Sometimes butchered grammar will appear. Sometimes it just won’t make any sense at all. Get over it! I’m human. I make mistakes too. So put your big girl panties on and SUCK IT!!!